Hollie posted this and so have a couple others on LJ. I know that one day anybody will be able to marry. I know this because my white mother married a black man, against her mother's wishes. America now has a multi racial president and that means more to me as a person that marks OTHER for my race on all information forms than you will ever truly know. It was bad enough that some of Hollie's family still believe it is not a totally good idea that we are married and let us not get into what they think about us possibly having children. I know I am crazy, but one day I would like to see that people keep there oppressive mindsets to themselves and just live life to the fullest. Obama becoming President is such a huge step for change on levels that address some of the darkest parts of the human psyche.

Bridget Regan is all legs and I am in lust! I love Attack of the Show sometimes.

No more Gina Carano fighting for right now. The Elite XC is no more. *whines*

I would have to say the Dresden Files as well. Jim Butcher is a great writer and the books translated well to a very good television series. SCI-FI really does not know what they killed.

Marty McFly: Wait a minute, Doc. Ah... Are you telling me that you built a time machine... out of a DeLorean?
Dr. Emmett Brown: The way I see it, if you're gonna build a time machine into a car, why not do it with some style?
_________________________________
Skinhead: You're coming with us upstairs!
Marty McFly: [struggling to get free] Let me go!
Match: [grabbing Marty] Sonny, we can do this the *easy* way or the *hard* way!
[3-D hits Marty over the head]
Miscellaneous voice: The easy way.
________________________________
Buford's Gang Member #2: Hey, take a gander at them moccasins! What kinda skins is them? What's that writing mean?
Buford's Gang Member #1: "Nee-kay"? What is that, some sorta Injun talk or something?

Bernie Mac is dead at 50 and that is a shock to me. The messed up part is that will the three curse work with comedians too? Since George Carlin died not too long ago. Who could be number three? Damn I am morbid.

The have gone an updated Clue for our time. I would love to play it, just to say I have. I wonder what board game they will update next? Possibly the game of Life? I thought it was bad when they made Monopoly credit card friendly. 

Hollie's lil' bro.

On the Today Show. With the Anti-Gravity team. He's the white boy with the red sleeveless shirt bouncing around like a mad thing.

Considering how much he got paid for this short little stint, and the guy stating ON CAMERA that these 5 were the best of the performers...I'm proud.

In other news: Mom is cancer-free. Tests came back negative, so that's extremely good news.

A V-Day Hijacking!

Yes, this is valeriana, and for a few moments, I'm going to hijack my beloved's journal so I can leave a little lj-love note.

My Dragon.

You are my everything. My sun, moon, stars, and comets in the night (perhaps even a black hole or two *winks*). You are my one true love, not perfect, but perfectly flawed. I thank the Powers That Be every single day to have you in my life, to share myself with you. You fill me with wonder, ever changing, so flexible in your interests. You make me proud, watching your first foray into the academic world after so long an absence, and knowing in my heart you're going to outshine all the rest with your intellect. You're smarter than you give yourself credit for, and your humbleness and modesty in this area are awe-inspiring. Your shrewd sense of humor leaves me gasping for air, and your keen insights leave me boggling at how perceptive you are.

There is nothing about you that I would change (not even your shifting moods and grumpiness from time to time). You are everything I could have ever hoped for in a partner, best friend, lover, and soulmate. You lavish me with attention and compliments that I'd never expect, you constantly make me feel more loved than any human woman should...and for that, even on my ugly, disagreeable days, I thank you. Your ability to see when I need to be touched, hugged, kissed, or otherwise cuddled is incomparable. I don't think I could ever expect a day when you'd not touch me in some form...and I'd always underestimated the power of human, loving touch until I met you. You pamper me, challenge me, intrigue me, love me, and make me laugh every single day.

You are my best friend. You are my love. You are my everything.

I love you. Yesterday, Today and Always. Is Forever too long?

***

I now return this journal to its rightful owner;)

Latino Heat is dead. That is really unexpected.

Red Dwarf series 4 - Easter egg hunt
From the Main Menu on disk 1, select the 'Select Episode' option. when this is selected a clip will appear where it moves from the main menu to the drive room Drive room, when this happens you will see a Skutter is holding a tape. Press ok when you see the skutter with the tape to reveal a short feature type movie of the cast having an easter egg hunt during their commentary recording session.

Red Dwarf series 4 - Animated Interview
1. Select Extras on Main Menu
2. Go to Plain Text mode
3. Go to the bottom feature on the menu, and go down to the Matter Paddle
4. You will go to an animated interview with the writers and director on the episode Dimension Jump.
Special Requirements:
Red Dwarf Series IV Disk 2

http://www.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/undead/

More zombie flicks. lol Besides Land of the Dead.

The gallery is done!

Since I play the role of seducer, heathen, and manipulator most of the time. It is interesting to sit back and become the unknown twist in someone’s life. The feeling of being phased out because you are that past that should be forgotten. The help you gave was like giving crack to a reformed, but not so reformed junkie. So in detaching from you, they detach from a part of themselves that was bad and good. Something that if they learned to control it, they could enjoy their cake and eat it too.

Life is a series of tests and boundaries. All tests should be taken and passed to your satisfaction, but most are to the satisfaction of others. Boundaries are laid to make you realize that you are not above the law of fate. You do not control your life and if you think you do, you are lying to yourself. Even your breathing is not controlled by your conscious mind. So what does one individual control? When you get in your car to drive to work, the people who made the car are the people controlling you. That is just one example of control.

Power is a mutual respect; I can only kick you as hard as you let me. It doesn't matter how strong one person is to how weak another is. The underdog normally wins because they have inner strength. Self-esteem is something devised to have power over you. Why should one person be better than another? Is it because society has said that this should be the blueprint for the total person or that that is the script to which you should act your life out?

Is a horrible person someone who speaks their mind or who keeps things to themselves? A brave man likes to feel the rain on his face, but a wise man knows when to get in out of the rain. If someone asks you to do them a favor and you do not, are you in the wrong? Or if you lay your whole being out for them to step all over, are they in the right? What is right and wrong?

Why do people keep secrets? Is it to help or hinder themselves and their interactions with others? Does anyone care if they tell you their life story after a life of lies? Would you believe them and are they an honorable person? Should you believe them or should you just chalk it up to one more big lie?

If the most evil and vile person paid you a compliment, are they lying? What if the most honorable and caring person paid you that same compliment, who would you think is being more sincere?

Destiny is comprised of errors and bad judgment. If you do not take the wrong path, you cannot be strong enough to know the right one. Even if you follow your gut instinct, something will inevitably steer you away from it. Then you kick yourself in the ass, but it's too late to change the overall decision.

Friends are there to remind you that you are human filth. They also make you feel like you are a savior of mankind. Strangers do the same thing, especially if you are a voice on a phone. I got hit on and bitched at in a seven hour period. Humans are highly emotional and react in varied ways. You should not be surprised the outcome of a given day, but you will be.

Peace will never happen when money rules the world. That goes double for love. People will readily kill for both, so there will never be harmony. Death is the only true peace, till you get reincarnated as a customer service person.

Sex is the epitome of all that is wrong and just in the world. The most intimate of unions can kill or create life. All wrapped in a pretty bow and given as a Christmas gift pack. A life can be cherished or crapped on. Oh how I love thee, let me count the ways.

I was going to go to sleep since it is almost midnight, but I read something that made me want to comment. Except, the comment possibly would be too long and others may need to read what I have to say.

I have read as well as been around a lot of strong woman. A lot of these strong woman are also sub's/slaves to someone, normally a male. At the same time, these strong woman try to process information from that male on the basis of what other males do. At the same time, I would have to say that this is my opinion from watching vast amounts of females and males interaction together and alone. Besides my own relationship and how it has changed and grown. Not to mention all males, like females, are not all the same.

Now some woman cannot understand how a man cannot view them as being submissive, or tell them things that they like. So that the woman can please them in that kinky unspoken way. Men, just like women, have been taught certain building blocks from birth. Some of these building blocks may be that you have to be a gentleman at all times around and toward a woman. When woman's lib became the norm, some women actually were offended by this. They could open their own doors, pay their own check, and actually may like a little pain with their sex. This used to be taboo, but now it seems to be the growing norm.

I also meet a lot of feminist that are submissive. The conflict with this is that, a male a lot of times does not distinguish certain things. A lot of men few a submissive female is bowing to their every need. This is more of a fantasy than a reality, but it does seem to be the norm. Especially if it is an online deal over the real thing. It's all about sucking cock, the male defiling the female, and anal sex. Some woman may like all or bits and pieces of this, but a lot of men want the whole package. Most of these men have some sort of self esteem problem that may figure into this or is a sadist.

If the male is fine with himself and or his self esteem, then he can if so choosing, inner mingle the dominance/testosterone with the sensual/sexual. It is not all about him, but more about the both of you in a cohesive bond. It is a fine line to walk, but it can be done and done well. Just like having a precocious submissive versus a bratty submissive, there is a difference there as well.

All too many look toward the media for how a relationship should go. Boy that threesome looks great in the porno, but in reality may wreak havoc with even the strongest relationships. You may even set rules and be totally into the idea until the idea becomes a reality. Such as watching two women having sex, versus you not being allowed for whatever reason to intercede if you'd like. The same with a woman watching two men. When the choice is taken away, especially if it's your "sub" making that choice, the male may feel not in control. Once that happens, look out, testosterone man on the loose. He will become headstrong and uncontrollable and normally agree to the utmost on everything, just to get out of the conversation. I've done it many a time. Oh and watch out for the guilt trip. Again, females can do the exact same thing, which I have been on the receiving end before.

There was a time not to long ago that I would cyber online. It did not get me to orgasm like traditional means and I could do this at work while fixing a persons computer problem. I would hardly ever cyber at home, because that meant it was more personal. Most of the woman I cybered with was a distraction, a way to manipulate them and get them to do things they normally wouldn't. A lot of the time they did and I loved it. It wasn't the sexual stuff that drove me, but the mental manipulation. That is where I am a dominant, although I will at times be physical as well. Normally it has to be asked for pain issues, but sexually I reign. Hollie knows this, even though she is more intelligent than I, I know this. That is our checks and balances, which is our respect.
The issue of lack of respect happened when I cybered. Hollie believed that cybering equaled cheating. Even though I did not ejaculate, we could never possibly touch, and they knew I was happily taken. The idea that they would physically get off by what I told them to do was the problem. I could flirt hardcore in comments or stories and that was it. Mainly because the person would reach orgasm elsewhere, if they so chose to. It wasn't real-time and that made the difference. I started equating everything to cheating which became a problem. If I did that, then I had fucked more woman than I could count on my fingers and toes combined. There is a separation between thought and action. Some people just don't get that or blow things out of proportion. We had many round and round arguments and discussions about this. This led to her becoming someone else to just see how I reacted with other women. This was bad and good on different levels.

For the most part I understood, but didn't, on the issue of real versus online. Many break up's have happened because of online activity and it's been party to divorce as well. Hollie knew and still knows I love the hell out of her, but she still worried that she didn't do it for me. When she does on many levels. I understand that certain levels she may not be privy too, because I know how she is. I've explained this too her, and for the most part she understands. For some, she does not and it gets discussed and brought up in conversation from time to time.

Now on to switches and the bi thing. I am more of a dominant when it comes to sex than anything else. I understand this and have tried being the submissive sexually. It doesn’t work out very well. For some, the idea of being submissive means sex or receiving pain is involved. This is not entirely true, but again, look at media and your surroundings. Also the submissive role may be one of humiliation, again this isn't entirely true. Hollie cooks, but I do the dishes, clean the house, and take care of the cats nine times out of ten. She loves to watch me clean and it makes me happy to make her happy. Most dominants may not believe in pleasuring the submissive orally. I fucking love it. I do have my times when I'd rather just have sex, but I do a lot of pussy worship. This can be viewed as an issue of control, but most of the times it's not. Shock, horror, gasp, I also am not keen on getting blowjobs. Yes I know you are floored now. If Hollie wanted to taste the finer points of a woman, that is up to her and is okayed by me. We've had more than one discussion about this and even if she wanted to play with males is fine. I know she loves me and I her. I also know she won't leave me and I won't leave her. As of right now there is only one person, yes they are female, that Hollie actually likes. I don't believe anything would ever happen because of timing and distance. I just watch and wait as per usual. If it happens great, if not oh well. It's better to be friends than anything else.

In closing and it's been said before, trust is the key. If one of the partners has done anything out of scene, the trust is strained. If you decide to enter into something that may test that trust, be ready to be let down or pleasantly surprised. The only rule is to give a true form of innocent until proven guilty. If you believe you can't deal with that one rule, then don't go into the situation. Most situations can blow up in your face and it becomes more like schoolyard rules.

It’s 1:20 A.M. and I’m going to fucking bed. The eclipse is over.

the past is your present
the present is your future
which is happening right now